Something I wrote as a Journal Entry....

My son's Heart

Since the time he was just tiny M has been different. There is no other explanation. There is no real way to explain it. My mother use to call him a child prodigy, my dad said he was a true genius. Everyone who meets him is amazed by his wealth of knowledge. He hasn't proven to be so gifted that he was reading and writing at 3. In fact I struggle daily with getting him to do just that. He is a perfectionist, which is a true curse. The child won't color, b/c he can't color perfectly in the lines. He didn't walk until he could stand up and glide across the room with ease. He didn't do anything he felt would be watched or judged until it was a perfected move. So it is with reading and writing that I find he doesn't want to practice, b/c he has to practice. Although, we fully expect him to just start reading one day....he read a sign the other day (pronounced it wrong, but still read it) out of nowhere in an unguarded moment.Now, I am off topic. My point in this post is to explain M's sweet little heart. He has ALWAYS wanted to know about Jesus and to read stories about Jesus. When he was 2 he told me he wanted to ask Jesus into his heart. So, he prayed with me and asked Jesus into his heart. I don't know if that counts or what that means...but how precious. M has been asking for a cross for years as well. So when my parents went to Israel (which M begged to go, too) they bought a cross made out of Olive wood for him. He LOVES his cross. He has been a bit rebellious the past year, testing limits and such. He would say things like I don't believe in Jesus. Just to get a reaction. Of course, he would also always ask the same old questions he always has and we'd have a little discussion about it. Well, today on the way to pick up from preschool he asked me, "Mommy if I died and I didn't believe in Jesus, would I not get to go to heaven." I said, with great reluctance,"I suppose that would be right." Then he said where would I go? Would I just not die and stay on Earth? We avoid the "hell" talk..b/c we believe M is too young and doesn't need to have fear invoked into his heart. Searching for an answer I said, "Well God gave us a gift when he gave us Jesus. Jesus came and lived and died for us. If we refuse God's gift as a payment for our sins then we can't go to be in heaven with him. We would be telling God we're too good for his gift and we don't need him. I know I need him and so we accept his gift and show him appreciation through the way we live." M, says "Did Jesus want to call angels to get him off the cross, but he didn't? Did his feet hurt?" I said, "yes he was hurt. He might have wanted to get off, but he knew he had to die for us." Then I said something else (which just came to my mind)..."M do you know who Jesus was thinking about when he was dying on the cross?" He said, "no." I said, "he was thinking about you and S and mommy and daddy and nanny and papa and Gigi and DeeDee and ALL the other people in the world and who have lived or ever will live." He got VERY quiet as he processed that.Matthew has a heart so seeking after God and so seeking for truth. It has caused me to question my beliefs ALOT! It sounds so far fetched of a story as you explain it in detail. It sounds bizarre and out there. I have a hard time grasping what I am saying. I have always just taken the Bible at its word. I have heard the stories and never questioned. Now as I try to explain it to my child I find myself grappling with the issues. Today something seemed to click for both of us. I realized it is truth I am speaking, not just what I have heard or been told. I hope he had the same realization.

A week in the life of....

I didn't have any pictures...so here are some from The Pumpkin Patch last week. They're not the good ones, but I'll get the rest on here eventually!

Last night we went to the Fall Festival at my parent's church. It wasn't nearly as fun as the City thingy. My sweet little flower did get her hair painted pink, after I made sure it wash out of blonde hair. My sweet sunshine chose glow in the dark. He didn't wear his bat costume, he decided to be an astronaut this time. I was so worried about him, b/c his neck is still hurting. I am taking him back to the doctor tomorrow. I have the same antsy feeling I did when he was 18 mths old and ended up in the er. I have a very strong intuitive side....and fortunately my doctor thinks a mother's intuition is about as important as any medicine. Sadly, I was in such a rush I didn't take the camera. Even sadder is that I didn't take it today either.

This morning the preschool had a little festival. I volunteered to work the boothes. It was very fun. Fun to play with the children and not have to teach them. My son decided not to wear a costume (he was only helping with me anyway). Afterwards my son and I went to lunch with all the mommy friends plus 1 dad. It's so nice I feel comfortable there and I even have new friends through the preschool. Kelley is still a my best girlfriend, but she works :-(. I haven't been sipping wine, so I won't get all sentimental.

Tomorrow we have ballet where they get to dress up again. Then we are going to "Trick or Treat" at Toys 'r' Us and then daddy will be home early!!! Tomorrow night I think we will be going to Kelley's neighborhood to play! I think we (the mommy and daddy) will be dressing up too. SOunds fun, but a little out of our norm!

Some of the other fun we've had this week:
~Pumpkin ice cream (my son's fave)
~Carving pumpkins (yes plural)
~Flu shots (not so fun and daddy gets flu shot duty next year...or atleast I can dream)
~making Christmas boxes to turn into the preschool
~voted!!!!
~Lunch at "little Which Which" Again my son's fave
~Dr's app't for my daughter's allergy to insect bites Monday
~Dr's app't Tuesday for my son's neck...oh and then a nose bleed that he didn't tell me about. I just found blood all over his face. His response..."It's no big deal" as I am freaking out. That kid is so tough, yet so breakable. He holds it all in (like his mommy) until he breaks (hence the many tears when he hits the breaking point).
~Seeing Beverly Hills Chihuahua
~Reading the entirity of Alice in Wonderland in 2 days...all 186 pages. They enjoyed it very much.

We also had an "I'm not getting out of the car moment" after the flu shots. He was THAT mad. So, I finished unbuckling him (he is still in a 5 pt harness, latched and tethered...Britax Frontier check it out..http://www.hipmonkey.com/car-seats/britax/britax-frontier/prod_97.html.), I took my daughter inside, left the front door open and sat on the ottoman, waiting for him to decide to come in. It worked...I haven't had another "power struggle" since.

It seems like there is more...it's been a long exhausting week. I haven't been able to eat...no appetite, I feel like I have mono again. I figure I need to lose weight...so what's the harm??? We did go running without daddy to push the double jogger. I only did 3.2...and then I finished with 2.6 miles on the tredmill.

That was our exciting week. I suppose the mommy should go to sleep now or clean :). Which reminds me of something my mother said her mother said (she also had 2 just short of 15 months apart)...She said she always had a broom in 1 hand and a mop in the other. Somehow she managed to keep the house cook from scrap and sew all their clothes. Did I mention she had my mom then 5 yrs later had 1 uncle followed 15 mths later by another and just short of 2 yrs another....there were also numerous miscarriages and hospitalizations (she had a hard time having babies) in there. How did she do it? I am not that strong...Of course there weren't distractions like TV and internet :-).

Fire Safety Town Friday October 24th, 2008

Snow White and her Prince

My little bat kept sneaking candy

The Prince carried the very tired princess

Inside the pretend fire truck

The bat inside the pretend fire truck

Snow White in the pretend fire truck

The bat

Playing in the pumpkin patch

Waiting in line

The crowds

Waiting in line

My little bat

My Snow White

Waiting in line to get inside where we got to stand in more lines to "trick or treat." My little bat and sweet Snow White had a wonderful time. They said it was even more fun than the fall festival.

Apparently my sweet girl is allergic to insect bites. Last year she had 2 or 3 bites on her thigh and required a ridiculous amount of benadryl to brin the swellin down. Saturday we went to see my inlaws and when we arrived I noticed my sweet girl's leg was bruised and swollen....Finally after some examination, a night full of excitement and some whining about her foot hurting...we called her pediatrician's office and talked to a urse. The nurse told us to go to the ER, to be sure there wasn;t something more. The ER doctor looked at her for about 5 seconds and prescribed the antibiotics as a precaution. Today I took her to her pediatrician and he said she is allergic to insects...and will require insect repellant everytime she goes out from now on. Poor baby girl. He did tell me how much benadryk to give her to bring the swelling down and help the itching. We're also putting Neosporin Plus, Caladryl and Cortisone on her to help relieve itching and keep it from getting infected.

That was our weekend mostly...we also went to a Fall Festival Saturday and my sister in Laws school...that was fun.

Pics will be added of Our Trick or Treat City Festival Friday Night.

Haircuts

My sweet little Sunshine (my son will now be referred to by his nickname) has always hated haircuts. He was better for a while...the last few times he's screamed and cried. It was b/c a lady last yr cut his neck...kept rubbing it with the razor which irritated his sensitive skin. When he cried she told him he couldn't have a sucker. I was mad, she hurt him and then was mad at him for crying! Anyway, I cut his hair last month and it didn't turn out well, b/c he was screaming and kicking (can we blame him after being cut?). I let it go too long, b/c it is torture for me as well as him. Today I finally cut his beautiful hair. He did much better. I really enjoyed it, b/c I was able to talk to him and spend time with him. I pretty much cut it all off. It's much shorter than normal, but it looks clean neat and straight. I figure it will grow out in a few weeks anyway! I told him if he will behave he can go to Sport's Clips. I will likely cut it for several more months to condition him on how he should act. The only reason I want him to go somewhere is so he can have a hairstyle...I can't do that.

My sweet boy.

BTW my daughter's nickname is flower.

I adore my sweet children.

Scissor Time

Yes I am guilty of not letting my children cut enough. It drives me crazy all the itty bitty pieces of paper everywhere...and there was my son who decided to cut open a gingerbread house kit one morning when he got up ridiculously early....he was smart, too. He woke his sister up and then they went to the VERY front of the house where they proceeded to eat all the candy....He lost scissors for a yr I think. Anyway, I found the coolest books from Kumon. They get to cut carefully on lines to create something. There is minimal mess, a fun project and they're learning! YAY! I wish I had known about this before. Although, I think 2 is a little young to place scissors in a child's hands. After they cut the first few they glued them on to some papers...that qualifies as art or a project/craft right? We plan to label each one and maybe make a story about 1 of them, too.

Introducing....

Pepe the Chihuahua.....

My mom's new puppy. She needed another dog, because Sugar is getting older. The little people are very attached. We found him and purchased him....and mi madre paid me back. He is very sweet and cuddly. The husband was NOT happy. He thought I was trying to pull a fast one to get him for myself.

Mall of America

Ballet Friend's Birthday Party

My daughter was invited to a birthday party at Libby Lu. It was SOOOO fun I am glad I didn't skip. I REALLy don't like going to places where I don't know anyone. It's just awkward for someone as shy as I am. I wanted to go to this one. The mom has been so kind and there are so many parallels it's like we were meant to meet. The other mom's were very kind and totally not snooty...something I have grown accustomed to in this area. Anyway, my baby girl had a FABULOUS time! I suspect we may be having an all girls party very soon.

I am so very thankful I have a daughter. I told myself I wanted boys, because I figured that's how it'd be. My husband's one of 2 boys, my sister has 3 boys and my husband's brother had all girls...When I had my son I was ecstatic and so in love. His name is the name I have held on to for years. He is a mamma's boy and has a very special place in my heart. When I found out I was having a daughter I cried. I had already suspected, but knowing for sure made me cry with thankfulness. She's not how I imagined. I thought she would have big blue eyes, dark curly hair...but instead God created her so sweetly...with a face very similar to mine, lips like her daddy's eye's that are turning green like her daddy and blonde curly hair. We have no idea why she's so blonde, but she is so beautiful. I wouldn't change a thing about my sweet independent angel.

Annual Trip to the State Fair

It's Official

My 5 yr old, 4 yr old and myself are flying to St Paul next weekend to see my brother and his family. My youngest nephew (I have 6 btw) is turning 1. That is why I like big families and want atleast 1 more baby...it's fabulous to have 6 nephews and 2 nieces...and my parents have 10 grandchildren! They scurry about the country a few times a year going to play and visit. That is so much better than "retirement."

You may ask where will the husband be next weekend if he's not going, too. He is going to be in Tampa this week and stay the weekend. His brother is flying in Saturday and they are going to a Bucaneers game. I found out the trip last weekend (I went with my BF to a game) was pre payment for next weekend...so now he says b/c I get a 2nd trip (to St Paul) he gets another. Boys!

Now the 'fight" begins. Who will get the camera next weekend? I'm sure Nanny (MIL) would agree who ever had Matthew and Sara ;-). Considering it WAS my birthday present and all!

Before I hurt someone's feelings, I did inherit the 2 sweetest nieces when I married my husband. They're all grown now, but I adore them! :-)

I just remembered My husband has a sweet half sister who also has 3 sons, 2 of which are older than me. The other one is 15...so 3 more nephews in the count. The grand total including in laws and halves...9 nephews and 4 neices. That's alot!

A New Phase of Life

So 3 yrs ago or so the husband tried to get a double jogger for me. I refused. I said I have enough trouble walking with the children, much less running with them. Well, we have all gained about 15 lbs since then..and guess what I FINALLY got the double jogger. I LOVE it. We went running as a family tonight for the very 1st time. It was also the 1st time i almost 2 yrs that I have run outside. The last time was Thanksgiving 2006. I ran 8 miles that day, but I struggled. The following Monday I came down with a high fever, but kept running. 2 weeks after that I was very sick and I ended up sick for months. That's when I gained 10 lbs, the other 5 is thanks to building muscle with my jillian book (eye rolling). I can barely run and push it, so my sweet husband pushed it and let me run ahead. Actually the first 1.6 miles he was passing me once in a while, the 2nd half I was WAY ahead. I had to wait at the corners, since it was really dark and all. At one point he was so far behind and a truck drove up...it hesitated at the corner, so I turned back towards the fam. Then the truck turned around and came back, so I grabbed my pepper spray out of the stroller. I could have gone again, but the husband was ready to go home. He hasn't been running but once every 2 mths.

Anyway, I am VERY excited to be able to run with my husband and very excited to have the freedom to get off the tredmill, even if I have to walk it. OH and I ran the first mile at under 10 min/mile pace. The rest was averaging around 11:30/mile. That is much better than I expected...I am glad my husband was there to help me pace better and to calculate my time when I thought I was running 17 min/mile ;-).

Now, I hope I can run the Turkey Trot and the 1/2 marathon. I hope one day to lose the 15 lbs I gained.

For nanny...we will have a pic of the grandchildren in the stroller...they had the top down tonight watching the stars and chattering....and saying "go faster." When I was ahead all I heard was, "slow down mommy!" "Daddy catch up to mommy."